Vomit Part I Reprise

Well, Boy vomited in the car again. He is coming down with something. Of course all the grandparents decide to feed him chocolate ice cream to make him feel better. Super. Mommy leaves Nana and Papa's house with Girl and a sick Boy full of chocolate ice cream. Here's the irony. He vomits at the exact same spot in the trip as he did on Thanksgiving. Right outside a liquor store. What I mean by exact same spot is where on the road on which the car is traveling. It's as if his belly has timed the trip exactly. An internal alarm clock, if you will. I won't go into the details (see Vomit Part I if you want them). Let's just say the stink is still wafting subtly in the air when I open the car door. Later that day Mommy calls me on the phone to let me know the situation. Vomiting definitely qualifies as a "situation". When she is telling me about what happened, Boy overhears about how he vomited in the exact same spot during the car trip as he vomited in on Thanksgiving, outside the liquor store. Upon hearing about how he's a repeat location vomiter I hear over the phone, "Oh, I'll have to find a new place to throw up".

Pants Optional

I can't get Boy to wear pants. I'm lucky if he's running around with even his tighty whiteys on. I was travelling for business the other day. My flight left late, shocking, so I got home around 8:00. I was expected a little earlier. I typically take cabs back from the airport. I live pretty close, it's convenient, hop right in the cab and go home. I live in a 1950s cape style house. The front door opens right into the living room. I walk in, the lights are low and nobody is there. There is a door at the rear of the living room leading to a hallway. I haven't announced my presence at this point in case Mommy has attempted to take the children upstairs to bed. Suddenly, Boy bursts out of the back hallway. Yes, he's completely naked. Why should he care about clothes. He proceeds to go into a body builder flexing the muscles stance. Big growl on his face. Grrrrrrrrrrr. You know the stance, both arms flexing down in front with fists, to truly maximize the muscle tone in the chest, shoulders and arms. I burst out laughing. The beach is that way! I yell. This gets him to do the stance where both hands are over his head pointing to the side. An alternate body-building stance, my personal favorite. Boy of course has no muscles. He is a wiry 3-year old. Mommy follows, looking irritated. I have to assume she's spent some time trying to get Boy to put on clothes, at least underwear. Clearly, she has fought a losing battle. At least she still tries. I take my pants off in solidarity.